About the Webmaster
my name is zachary and im twenty two years old. my hobbies include writing, drawing, listening to music, and not shutting up. my favorite things are: history, plates of enchiladas, postcards, office supplies, and frozen yogurt. hmm.. not very interesting...
another thing about me is that i'm working on a comic called lucifer king very, very, VERY slowly.
My Life Story
on an unfortunate wednesday twenty-two years ago, i immediately understood the horrors that were to await me outside of the womb. as such, i tried to hang myself in the womb, but my attempted stillbirth was thwarted by well meaning physicians. after that, i was a prodigy boy and succeeded at tasks like breathing, crawling, walking, and eating but it was not to last... i peaked at about 10 years old and it has been all downhill since then.
Fun Facts
- legally, i am required to wear corrective lenses when i operate a motor vehicle
- i have watched all of the saw movies consecutively eight times
- my father wanted to name me nathaniel. why would he ever suggest this?
- i am afraid of mushrooms because im afraid i will breathe in their spores and begin to grow clusters of mushrooms inside of my lungs. i have had this fear since i was a young child
- when time allows, i like to swim in the pacific ocean
- i go to college to get more knowledge
- the local news station owns a 10 second clip from 2011 of me using the computer where you can see the back of my head
- i can drink a 16.9 oz bottle of water in just under 12 seconds (retimed 1/19/2026)
- some might find me borderline attractive from afar
Things I Like
- 20th century history (especially US 1900-1930)
- drawing and painting
- mesoamerican history
- dancing
- sexy cars (pre 1970)
- writing
- practical effects, especially in horror movies
- printing (love/hate)
- all kinds of music
- watching music videos for several hours
- making up people in my mind
- stuff nobody really cares about "You learn something new every day, relevant or not" - My dad
movies & tv
- silence of the lambs
- SAW
- black mirror: bandersnatch
- the hitcher (1986)
- the spy kids trilogy
-
- madoka magica
- picket fences
video games
toontown (rewritten)
my main toons are kona (trapless perwinkle cat), twister (toonupless slate crocodile), and napoleon (lureless peach pig) they're 114, 87, and 53 laff respectively. if you ever want to play, send me a message :]
- stardew valley (700 hours and counting!)
wizard 101
my two wizards are ashton swiftcrafter (ice, 76) and isaiah dreamweaver (death, 32). i don't play very often anymore
- danganronpa (only 1 and 2)
- spy fox
- tomodachi life
- undertale & deltarune
- minesweeper
books & comics
quiz results
see what im listening to (links to last.fm)